My mom runs a daycare and is constantly looking for good deals on toys to add to her playroom. We found a good deal on a dollhouse on craigslist, so we decided to meet at the mall to make the trade. We could tell the lady was from Eastern Europe due to her accent, when we asked where, she said UKRAINE!!! It was such a coincidence, she had a lot of valuable information to share about her country and her struggles growing up there, it was very interesting. We ended up chatting forever. We became friends and she even offered to interpret a phone call to Alona with us.
We hadn't called Alona since October so we were so excited! Alona sounded great and hadn't been notified yet that she was for sure invited back to our house. When we told her, she was sooo happy, and said, "I really really really want to go to America."
The other cute thing that happened was this:
My mom: "Alona, I can't wait for a hug when you come to America."
Alona: "I come to America and you hug me."
First of all, great sentence. Secondly, how sweet.
We could also tell she had been trying hard to learn english, she gained a few more words. For example, "Booooring." (She said this when we were talking about our 16 hour car drive to Reno, Nevada last summer)
She also learned "hope"- she said, "I hope to swim when I come to America, I really really really like swimming." That's not a lie, that girl would swim for days if you didn't drag her out of the pool.
OUR GROWING FAMILY
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Hosting Alona in 2008
I wrote this a couple months after we hosted Alona last summer. It sums up every little detail of our 6 weeks with her.
Our story starts with an e-mail. It was from my aunt saying that Ukrainian kids affected by Chernobyl will be coming over here to get proper nutrition for 6 weeks with an organization called Global Family Alliance. It went on to say that some were orphans and could possibly be adoptable. We looked at all the kids faces, and quickly realized we couldn't say no to this opportunity. We chose to host Alona, a little girl who was living with a gaurdian but would "supposedly" soon be put on the adoption list. We had previously chosen an orphan but were notified last minute that she was going to adopted. So we chose the little blondie that had first caught our eye.
The weeks leading up to Alona's visit were exciting. We looked at her picture everyday with anticipation. I endlessly shopped the sales racks at Macy's scooping up every good deal I could find. We were so excited for this journey- no one knew what to expect.. and that's what made everything so fun!
The week before Alona's arrival seemed to creep by, we were so excited and the anticipation of meeting her was killing us. Up until this point, we had only one picture that we were constantly looking at. Before we knew it, we would be seeing that little face in real life. We were more then prepared for her. She had a brand new wardrobe and everything else that she could possibly dream of, awaiting her arrival.
Then we met her.
All the the host families were sitting down in a waiting area, above us was a balcony that all the kids would have to walk across to go get there things in baggage claim. We waited forever and FINALLY the kids were here. As they stood on the balcony looking down at us, we couldn't tell which one was Alona. Finally my brother said, "There she is, that's her." At the moment we realized it was definitely her. A gfa board member, walked up to her and pointed down at us. She looked and gave us a big smile, she seemed relieved that after all that traveling there was a family waiting for her.
I started crying of course. Despite her circumstances, the fact that a ten year old girl could travel to a foreign place, to stay with a foreign family, and smile like that, was amazing to me.
My dad later said, "I now believe in love at first sight."
When she approached us, she seemed stiff and scared. We tried to rub her back or hug her, but she didn't seem responsive. She looked really tired and confused. The language barrier made it very hard to ease her tensions. In the airport, she had to use the bathroom, she didn't know how to lock the bathroom stall door, so I just held it for her. When trying to wash her hands, she couldn't figure out how to turn the sink on, so I showed her how it was automatic. When we got in the car, she had never worn a seatbelt before, so we had to put it on for her. It was clear from the first 30 minutues, that things in America were quite different here from where she lived in Ukraine. At that moment, I understood how scared she was- nothing was the same! She sat the whole time, wide-eyed in the backseat. When we got home, we gave her a tour of the house. She seemed in awe, she even said something in russian- we just smiled. We stuck her in the bath the first night. We figured it would feel good after all the traveling and help her relax... plus, she desperately needed one.
After the first week, things started to change very quickly as she became more comfortable with her surroundings and her english vocabulary grew. She came into her own and we found that our shy, scared, and meek child at that airport no longer existed. Instead, we were blessed with an ambitous, HAPPY, persistant, sweet, fearless, loves to laugh, SMART, full of energy and life, 10 year old girl. The language barrier got easier and easier as time progressed, it's amazing how much you can communicate with just a "yes" or a "no" and a lot on nonverbal communication. We were lucky though, Alona was super aware of her surroundings so she understood almost everything we were trying to say and picked up on words extremely quick. She also had absolutely no fear when it came to trying to speak english. She was determined and would repeat words without any hesitation. She also picked up on the little words we all tend to overuse, like saying "ouch," "oops," "uh," "oh my gosh," and "ohhh."
Trip to the dentist...
She had her first dental appointment the same week that she arrived. She seemed a little nervous but not overly concerned. Before the dentist, Ommy (my grandma), Jillian (my sister), Marina (the interpreter), and Alona went to Target and Red Robin. Target has a dollar spot in the front of the store, so I told her she could pick out 2 things. Alona looked at everything very meticulously and overwhelmed, trying to figure out what exactly everything was, she kept making this gesture of taking it off the paper and putting it on her hand. I realized she was trying to figure out if they were stickers. Stickers were a very big hit the entire time she was with us. She would stick them all over her body, even all over her face. I led her to the art kit sets where she picked out this kit where you color the stickers yourself. Ommy picked out a Dora memory game for us to play with Alona. Marina described to her how you match pairs. She seemed excited. We will later see that it became her FAVORITE game ever. We would play everyday, multiple times. NOTE: If you're adopting or hosting a child, get memory. Alona learned a lot of vocab words and LOVED the game.
We were finally at the dentist.
Before the dental hygenist was about to look in her mouth, she started saying something in Russian to Marina. Marina seemed to be reassuring her. When I asked what she was so worried about, Marina told me that she asked if they were going to extract any teeth. Marina went on to explain that the dentistry can be horrible in Ukraine, especially if you don't have the money to afford the very best. We assumed that Alona must have had a previous bad experience. The appointment went very well but it was clear that Alona would need a lot of work done on her teeth. Curious of their concerns, I looked in Alona's mouth. Her teeth were in very poor condition, they were yellow and looked like they were rotting. She told the dentist that her mouth hurt too. We made two appointments to get everything in order.
The dentist was very sweet to Alona and cried when we explained some details of Alona's life. At the end, Alona told Marina that the dentists in America didn't hurt and were very nice.
Alona had two more dental visits after the initial one. They all went very well. In the end she had 4 teeth extracted, 2 crowns, and 2 cavities!
In weeks 2-5 we were very busy. The highlights include a road trip to Reno, Nevada and Lake Tahoe, California, trips to the beach and local swimming pool, gymnastics lessons, boating, watching Jillian play a lot of volleyball, memory game, badminton, a trip to the zoo, playdates etc.
Here are my more of my favorite memories:
Alona's improvements in swimming: Alona amazed everyone at the pool with her swimming progress. Everytime we went to the pool, she would learn something new or have some new trick to show us. My brother Joe and sister Jillian both work at the local private pool so they would give her free lessons. At first, she was terrified to jump off the side of the pool, but by the end, she would do tricks off the diving board. On her first attempt, she stood on the board for five minutes, kids piling up behind her anxiously waiting their turn- we told her "Ok, go!" about a million times... but she didn't. Then we told her she had to get off the board because other kids wanted to go- she wouldn't budge. She finally got off the board only to return about five minutes later. This time, she was going to do it. I could tell by the look in her eyes that she was not going to be defeated by the board again.. and then she jumped!
Taking Alona shopping: I took Alona to Old Navy to get a new pair of jeans. She tried on numerous pairs and then found the perfect pair. I told her to go outside the dressing room to look in the big mirror. She walked through the entire aisle swinging her hips, you could tell she felt like a little princess.
The Zoo: Bret and I took Alona to the zoo. She absolutely loved it. She would say "Picture" everytime we saw a new animal, she wanted to capture every moment and every new thing there. We could not pull her away from the bird exhibit, where you feed the parakeets and cockatails, and they land on you. She also loved the reptile night exhibit, we went through it about 3 times.
Memory Game: Alona was so good! She would beat everyone every time! It was insane. We would beat her occasionally, 1 in 5 times maybe, if we were lucky. When she played kids her age, she would win everytime, usually like 32 pairs to 4 pairs.
Boating: She loved being out on the water. It was so cute to see a 10 year old who never had been on a boat, she would peek through the little holes and watch the water pass by from inside the cabin. Every part of it was very exciting for her and so fun for us to watch.
Our last week with Alona was so amazing, but also sad. She started to break out of her shell even more. She actually became pretty crazy- in a good way of course. She would love to SNORT (I don't know where she picked this up), run and jump around the house, and giggle non-stop. She's such a happy girl.
Her increased energy was one thing that was changing, but her affection towards us was evolving even more. The same girl who panicked when anyone would try to pick her up, got stiff when we hugged her, and turned her head away from people in pictures, now was CONSTANTLY jumping on us, hugging us, or trying to snuggle with us. I think she knew her time here was almost over, and she was trying to hang on to us, literally and figuratively. Even though it's been over 4 months, I still have vivid memories of some of the last moments with her.
Our story starts with an e-mail. It was from my aunt saying that Ukrainian kids affected by Chernobyl will be coming over here to get proper nutrition for 6 weeks with an organization called Global Family Alliance. It went on to say that some were orphans and could possibly be adoptable. We looked at all the kids faces, and quickly realized we couldn't say no to this opportunity. We chose to host Alona, a little girl who was living with a gaurdian but would "supposedly" soon be put on the adoption list. We had previously chosen an orphan but were notified last minute that she was going to adopted. So we chose the little blondie that had first caught our eye.
The weeks leading up to Alona's visit were exciting. We looked at her picture everyday with anticipation. I endlessly shopped the sales racks at Macy's scooping up every good deal I could find. We were so excited for this journey- no one knew what to expect.. and that's what made everything so fun!
The week before Alona's arrival seemed to creep by, we were so excited and the anticipation of meeting her was killing us. Up until this point, we had only one picture that we were constantly looking at. Before we knew it, we would be seeing that little face in real life. We were more then prepared for her. She had a brand new wardrobe and everything else that she could possibly dream of, awaiting her arrival.
Then we met her.
All the the host families were sitting down in a waiting area, above us was a balcony that all the kids would have to walk across to go get there things in baggage claim. We waited forever and FINALLY the kids were here. As they stood on the balcony looking down at us, we couldn't tell which one was Alona. Finally my brother said, "There she is, that's her." At the moment we realized it was definitely her. A gfa board member, walked up to her and pointed down at us. She looked and gave us a big smile, she seemed relieved that after all that traveling there was a family waiting for her.
I started crying of course. Despite her circumstances, the fact that a ten year old girl could travel to a foreign place, to stay with a foreign family, and smile like that, was amazing to me.
My dad later said, "I now believe in love at first sight."
When she approached us, she seemed stiff and scared. We tried to rub her back or hug her, but she didn't seem responsive. She looked really tired and confused. The language barrier made it very hard to ease her tensions. In the airport, she had to use the bathroom, she didn't know how to lock the bathroom stall door, so I just held it for her. When trying to wash her hands, she couldn't figure out how to turn the sink on, so I showed her how it was automatic. When we got in the car, she had never worn a seatbelt before, so we had to put it on for her. It was clear from the first 30 minutues, that things in America were quite different here from where she lived in Ukraine. At that moment, I understood how scared she was- nothing was the same! She sat the whole time, wide-eyed in the backseat. When we got home, we gave her a tour of the house. She seemed in awe, she even said something in russian- we just smiled. We stuck her in the bath the first night. We figured it would feel good after all the traveling and help her relax... plus, she desperately needed one.
After the first week, things started to change very quickly as she became more comfortable with her surroundings and her english vocabulary grew. She came into her own and we found that our shy, scared, and meek child at that airport no longer existed. Instead, we were blessed with an ambitous, HAPPY, persistant, sweet, fearless, loves to laugh, SMART, full of energy and life, 10 year old girl. The language barrier got easier and easier as time progressed, it's amazing how much you can communicate with just a "yes" or a "no" and a lot on nonverbal communication. We were lucky though, Alona was super aware of her surroundings so she understood almost everything we were trying to say and picked up on words extremely quick. She also had absolutely no fear when it came to trying to speak english. She was determined and would repeat words without any hesitation. She also picked up on the little words we all tend to overuse, like saying "ouch," "oops," "uh," "oh my gosh," and "ohhh."
Trip to the dentist...
She had her first dental appointment the same week that she arrived. She seemed a little nervous but not overly concerned. Before the dentist, Ommy (my grandma), Jillian (my sister), Marina (the interpreter), and Alona went to Target and Red Robin. Target has a dollar spot in the front of the store, so I told her she could pick out 2 things. Alona looked at everything very meticulously and overwhelmed, trying to figure out what exactly everything was, she kept making this gesture of taking it off the paper and putting it on her hand. I realized she was trying to figure out if they were stickers. Stickers were a very big hit the entire time she was with us. She would stick them all over her body, even all over her face. I led her to the art kit sets where she picked out this kit where you color the stickers yourself. Ommy picked out a Dora memory game for us to play with Alona. Marina described to her how you match pairs. She seemed excited. We will later see that it became her FAVORITE game ever. We would play everyday, multiple times. NOTE: If you're adopting or hosting a child, get memory. Alona learned a lot of vocab words and LOVED the game.
We were finally at the dentist.
Before the dental hygenist was about to look in her mouth, she started saying something in Russian to Marina. Marina seemed to be reassuring her. When I asked what she was so worried about, Marina told me that she asked if they were going to extract any teeth. Marina went on to explain that the dentistry can be horrible in Ukraine, especially if you don't have the money to afford the very best. We assumed that Alona must have had a previous bad experience. The appointment went very well but it was clear that Alona would need a lot of work done on her teeth. Curious of their concerns, I looked in Alona's mouth. Her teeth were in very poor condition, they were yellow and looked like they were rotting. She told the dentist that her mouth hurt too. We made two appointments to get everything in order.
The dentist was very sweet to Alona and cried when we explained some details of Alona's life. At the end, Alona told Marina that the dentists in America didn't hurt and were very nice.
Alona had two more dental visits after the initial one. They all went very well. In the end she had 4 teeth extracted, 2 crowns, and 2 cavities!
In weeks 2-5 we were very busy. The highlights include a road trip to Reno, Nevada and Lake Tahoe, California, trips to the beach and local swimming pool, gymnastics lessons, boating, watching Jillian play a lot of volleyball, memory game, badminton, a trip to the zoo, playdates etc.
Here are my more of my favorite memories:
Alona's improvements in swimming: Alona amazed everyone at the pool with her swimming progress. Everytime we went to the pool, she would learn something new or have some new trick to show us. My brother Joe and sister Jillian both work at the local private pool so they would give her free lessons. At first, she was terrified to jump off the side of the pool, but by the end, she would do tricks off the diving board. On her first attempt, she stood on the board for five minutes, kids piling up behind her anxiously waiting their turn- we told her "Ok, go!" about a million times... but she didn't. Then we told her she had to get off the board because other kids wanted to go- she wouldn't budge. She finally got off the board only to return about five minutes later. This time, she was going to do it. I could tell by the look in her eyes that she was not going to be defeated by the board again.. and then she jumped!
Taking Alona shopping: I took Alona to Old Navy to get a new pair of jeans. She tried on numerous pairs and then found the perfect pair. I told her to go outside the dressing room to look in the big mirror. She walked through the entire aisle swinging her hips, you could tell she felt like a little princess.
The Zoo: Bret and I took Alona to the zoo. She absolutely loved it. She would say "Picture" everytime we saw a new animal, she wanted to capture every moment and every new thing there. We could not pull her away from the bird exhibit, where you feed the parakeets and cockatails, and they land on you. She also loved the reptile night exhibit, we went through it about 3 times.
Memory Game: Alona was so good! She would beat everyone every time! It was insane. We would beat her occasionally, 1 in 5 times maybe, if we were lucky. When she played kids her age, she would win everytime, usually like 32 pairs to 4 pairs.
Boating: She loved being out on the water. It was so cute to see a 10 year old who never had been on a boat, she would peek through the little holes and watch the water pass by from inside the cabin. Every part of it was very exciting for her and so fun for us to watch.
Our last week with Alona was so amazing, but also sad. She started to break out of her shell even more. She actually became pretty crazy- in a good way of course. She would love to SNORT (I don't know where she picked this up), run and jump around the house, and giggle non-stop. She's such a happy girl.
Her increased energy was one thing that was changing, but her affection towards us was evolving even more. The same girl who panicked when anyone would try to pick her up, got stiff when we hugged her, and turned her head away from people in pictures, now was CONSTANTLY jumping on us, hugging us, or trying to snuggle with us. I think she knew her time here was almost over, and she was trying to hang on to us, literally and figuratively. Even though it's been over 4 months, I still have vivid memories of some of the last moments with her.
Meet the Fam
After reading numerous blogs about people's adoptions journey, I was inspired to put my families own journey in writing. Although the future adoption is tentative, and our journey ahead is a long road, I have faith that this experience will be one worth recording. Already thus far in our adventure, there have been many beautiful moments and lessons learned, that I feel need to be shared and remembered by our family.
Let me first describe my family. My mom and dad are proud parents of four children. My oldest brother is 25, his names Jacob. He went to UTI in Arizona then BMW School in Texas. He now works at BMW Seattle as an auto technician. I am the second born, my name is Justine and I am currently a senior at Western Washington University in Bellingham, WA pursuing a finance degree. Joseph is the third born, he is a freshman at Seattle University also pursuing a finance degree. Jillian is the baby of the family; she’s a junior in high school who loves volleyball and hanging with her friends.
My mom and dad have been an amazing duo for 26 years last January. I swear they are even more in love than the day they got married (when they were 19 and 20 years old). My dad works at Boeing and my mom runs an in-home daycare. They share one true passion, and that's for kids. Raising them, being around them, and helping them. They have devoted their entire lives to our happiness and have never been closed-minded to expanding our family even further!
Let me first describe my family. My mom and dad are proud parents of four children. My oldest brother is 25, his names Jacob. He went to UTI in Arizona then BMW School in Texas. He now works at BMW Seattle as an auto technician. I am the second born, my name is Justine and I am currently a senior at Western Washington University in Bellingham, WA pursuing a finance degree. Joseph is the third born, he is a freshman at Seattle University also pursuing a finance degree. Jillian is the baby of the family; she’s a junior in high school who loves volleyball and hanging with her friends.
My mom and dad have been an amazing duo for 26 years last January. I swear they are even more in love than the day they got married (when they were 19 and 20 years old). My dad works at Boeing and my mom runs an in-home daycare. They share one true passion, and that's for kids. Raising them, being around them, and helping them. They have devoted their entire lives to our happiness and have never been closed-minded to expanding our family even further!
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